I assure you I love the church, and would rather be a member of the smallest, weakest SBC church in the world than a mega church of any other stripe. However, I have witnessed some bizarre moments in churches.

Like the time I marched the VBS processional around the casket of a long time church member whose family had him “laid out” in the church despite the VBS schedule.

Or the lady who asked me if I was “going to integrate her church?”  She was a public school teacher.

Or the deacon who complained that his preacher didn’t visit anyone.  How would the deacon know?  He had not been to an outreach event in his church in years.

Then there were the deacons who insisted on a July 4 Wednesday night service, called a special business meeting for that night, and voted the preacher out.

Or the angry church member who was arrested for stealing church property.  Actually he came in the middle of the night to take down the sign he had given to the church years before.  The pastor, hearing someone on the property late at night, called the sheriff’s office.

Then there was the church which had a fellowship supper in late summer, and refused to serve the venison till after the sheriff had eaten and left.

Or the time I fell in the grave at a funeral service. (You’ll have to hear my sermon on Luke 7 to get the whole story.)

A lady actually called my office to complain that her church was building its new building too close to the highway.

And a former pastor griped to me about the ABSC starting Hispanic churches because they caused unemployment.

A church withdrew fellowship from a member because he and his family had visited the church I pastored.

A lady, actually a matriarch, informed me that God was not pleased with all those folks who came to our revival service.  “Which ones were He displeased with?”  I asked.  Her response: the ones who applauded rather than said “Amen.”

Folks in one church actually wanted to use a dog as a prop in a wedding service.  Thank God for the WMU.

Bizarre, huh?  But you could probably top these examples.  Right?

This blog is posted every Friday.  I’d love to hear about the most bizarre thing you’ve seen in church.  This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it